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dealing with PMS..

There is a lot of advice out there on how to deal with PMS, some of it practical, most of it not. After conducting a thorough poll here at debambam's cafe, here are the top tips to help you (and those around you) survive:

Exercise: Exercise gets the blood pumping and releases endorphins into your system that can eat up all the naughty hormones that are messing with you mentally and physically. I've found the most effective exercise is that which appeases both the body and mind. This could include taking your weapon of choice and chasing anything that moves around the house until you've worked up a good sweat. Personally I prefer the meat cleaver, it's lightweight yet menacing enough to scare your prey, with little risk of accidentally slicing off your own toe should you fall down.

Diet: A well balanced diet can be your saviour. Be sure to stock up on all the good things in life. Fruit and vegetables are perfect for throwing at anyone who upsets you, particularly the man in your life who has no freakin idea what it's like to wake up with a second personality in your head telling you that anger is your friend. Tomatoes are perfect. As are banana's, if you miss these just may come back to you if thrown correctly.

Meditation: Take time each day to relax, and contemplate the good in your life. Like girly movies, popcorn and tissues. Like having an excuse to yell or cry at the drop of a hat once every month. Like getting caught in the rain - without an umbrella and in your brand new dress which looks like crap cos your all bloated....wheres' my meatcleaver? Ssomeone has to PAY FOR THIS....Sorry, I digress. It's also a good time to plan how you will pay your bail, because one of these days you are going to get caught. For something.

Chinese Herbal Remedies: There are many claims that evening primose oil helps some. Personally if something has the letters "shrooms" in it's title and was purchased in a dark alley shop with those annoying bead door curtains and more smoke floating around the air than in a cigar bar, it's a safe bet that it will alter the mind and body enough to make PMS disappear...It will walk out the door with those little green gnomes that just baked you a chocolate and pineapple cake while singing the theme from the muppets.

Drugs: Drugs come in many forms and it's going to be trial and error while you find one that works for you. There are two which clearly stand out as global remedies-

• Caffeine whilst is not good for the body, is most certainly good for the mind - which ultimately controls the body, so it's needs are far more important. It's widely available in a variety of forms with the clear favorites being chocolate and coffee. Ensure you have adequate supplies on hand. Be warned however, particularly with coffee, wakefulness can occur in some when copious amounts are consumed. If this happens be sure to partake in some of that exercise I mentioned earlier. Wear yourself out.
• Alcohol when used correctly can immediately do one of two things. It will either numb your body and soul to the point where your asking "WHAT'S PMS?" or will magnify any feelings you have to such an extent you will have no choice but to expel them or implode into nothingness. It may be a good idea to write letters to those you love explaining that such actions are not really your own, just those of a hormonal and drunk women on the edge of sanity so please don't take it personally.

I hope that you can find some relief here. If you have any other practical tips of your own, please forward them to the counter. Debambam's cafe is always more than willing to take suggestions from those in the know...which would be anyone other than current staff. Have a nice day and come again!

coffee at home tips

With more and more specialty coffee shops cropping up all over the place, it’s easy to “spoil” yourself with the experience of drinking a well made coffee. The smell, the texture, the flavor…it’s all simply divine! Of course, then you get home to your tin of instant granules and suddenly this just doesn’t seem to be good enough anymore does it? With a little bit of knowledge, a touch of passion and some basic equipment you could be enjoying the sensation of freshly brewed coffee in your own home. Go on, you deserve it!

Decide on your brewing method: Drip filters and plungers (or french press) are the 2 easiest, effective and affordable methods of brewing coffee at home. Drip filters are great for those who drink large volumes in short periods, while plunger is great for one or two cups at a time. Neither makes a better coffee than the other, it comes down to personal preference. If you’re undecided as to which one will suit you best, ask store attendants to help you and explain how they work. Be sure to carefully read the instructions and cleaning methods that come with your purchase to ensure you get the best from your equipment.

Brewing tips: For either method start by using approx. 1 rounded tablespoon of ground coffee for each 180mls of water, adjust this to taste through trial and error. Any medium roast bean is ideally suited for these types of brewing. Darker roasts are designed for espresso extraction methods so you won’t get the best flavor.
Drip Filter: Start with cold and preferably filtered water, ensure the filter area is dry and clean before starting. Only brew what will be consumed within an hour or so, just because it will stay hot for longer, doesn’t mean it should! After a length of time the coffee becomes bitter, loses body and becomes syrupy.
PlungerStart with a clean and dry plunger, boil the water and let stand for 2 minutes BEFORE pouring onto ground beans, stir thoroughly and let stand for no longer than 3-4 minutes then “plunge”. Drink immediately. It’s normal for plunger coffee to have a little residue at the bottom of the cup.

Buy fresh beans: It’s best to buy your beans on a regular basis in small amounts, preferably weekly if possible. Don’t be tempted to buy in bulk when on sale! The older the bean, the less flavor, aroma and oils the bean will still have. When having them ground, be sure to tell them your brewing method, each method requires a different coarseness of grind to get the best extraction. If you are truly a coffee connoisseur, treat yourself to a grinder and buy the beans whole. Ground beans stale much faster than whole ones and nothing beats the smell or taste of freshly ground coffee.

Storage: Store your whole or ground beans in an airtight container away from light, moisture, odors and extreme temperature. DO NOT FREEZE OR REFRIGERATE. Coffee absorbs moisture and odors, both of which affect the flavor considerably.

General Tips: If you can purchase your beans from a store that roasts their own, do it! It generally means the coffee is much fresher.
Boiling water and/or milk scold the coffee and burn the flavor.
Coffee should NOT taste bitter, if it does, something is wrong. There are many reasons why this occurs but the most common would be stale beans, liquid too hot, unclean equipment or the wrong type of grind or bean for the extraction method.
Ask you favorite café or coffee house for tips and advice, any true barista will be more than happy to share their expertise.
Experiment with flavored and Estate beans. There are so many different textures, flavors, aromas and sensations to experience when drinking coffee; you’ll be amazed just how different two cups can be!

And finally, ENJOY!

survival tips for new mums

Becoming a mother for the first time can be scary, exciting, daunting, emotional and so much more. Especially when you find out over half way through your pregnancy and are so clue less that before you have time to digest the idea that you have life inside of you, there is suddenly a tiny scrap of humanity that you are responsible for. Of course that is just one story...mine! No matter the circumstances it’s a journey your never going to forget. These survival tips are all things that I either employed or with the wisdom of hindsight would employ. Please remember these are things that worked for ME and may or may not help you at all. I’m simply a mum who found ways to make life a little easier to cope with during those first months of motherhood.

During pregnancy and beyond: While pregnant take note of your babies movement/sleeping times. Keep an eye on your cravings/food aversions. Your infants sleeping habits may uncannily resemble their movement times while your toddlers tastes may just mimic your own during pregnancy. Don’t just record your babies milestones, but keep one for yourself too. It’s amazing the things and emotions you will forget after those first 12 months. I still remember things when I read the online entries I did, but without the prompting those memories would fade into nothingness. I also write letters to Zoe, did one when I was in Labor, and have done one every year on her birthday since. Figure i’ll give them to her when I deem it’s appropriate!

Sleep when you can: Again, both during pregnancy and once your bundle of joy has arrived. Never underestimate the effect that sleep deprivation has over your body, mind and emotions. Nothing is more important than your health and sanity, especially not that load of dishes which will NOT cause the sky to fall down if they aren’t done straight away!

Beware the “expert”: You will be offered so much good natured advice, but there are always those that claim to have ALL the answers and THEIR way is the ONLY way. I have one word to say to that: BOLLOCKS. There is only one way for doing everything from putting on a nappy to how much you cuddle your new born. And that way is YOURS. When encountering said experts I’ve found the best way is simply to nod and smile politely...

Read, read and read some more: I say read because with this wonderful tool called the Internet, you have access to what can become your biggest and most valuable resource. (Lets face it too, talking to people opens up the door for those “experts” described above) There are a million sites out their offering communities for women who have but one thing in common. Their children. What a way to start what can become an extremely intense bond! Find one that suits you and join. Talking to others who are going through what you are right now is the best therapy you’ll ever need! Pregnancy, labor and birth do some weird and wonderful things to your body, mind and hormones...knowing what your experiencing is also being experienced by others is often enough to ally the fears that there is something horribly wrong with you. You’ll also have an audience who won’t get bored with your enthusiasm over all those milestones you and your baby are achieving. They’ll also ease your mind when your child isn’t doing what they are “supposed” to be doing. Trust me, questions like “Is she walking yet” (when she isn’t) will have you wondering why the heck not and send you on an unending search for the answer. These communities will save your sanity. Having said all that, there is still nothing quite like a cuppa with others while you compare babies and notes, so be sure to check your local council for any “real” new mum groups in your neighbourhood.

Trust your instincts: Mother nature is a wonderful giver. She gives us the tools and subconscious ability to create life without having to think about the details - we don’t sit and think “Oh it’s day 96, time to grow some eyelashes!”*** She gives our new-borns characteristics which make us want to nurture and love them - large eyes and head. Listen to her when she talks! If your instincts tell you something is wrong, then it probably is. If your instincts tell you that attachment parenting is the way to go, then do it. Trust your instincts....I can’t say it enough.

Ask for help: If you need help, ASK. Your pride is not worth putting yourself or your baby at risk. If your ever speaking to my mother, ask her about the day I called her crying hysterically down the phone “I can’t do this anymore!!” She came home from work early and looked after Zoe while I sat on the floor of the shower and bawled my eyes out for half an hour. She’ll also tell you her immediate response was “What took you so long?”Don’t forget to be YOU: Make sure you take regular time out just for you...time to forget that your a mum. Whilst there is nothing wrong with belonging to that most outstanding club called “Motherhood”, their was, is, and will be, more to who you are than that. Don’t lose yourself on your new journey, it takes a while to come back, believe me I know!

ENJOY your new role and baby: It can be easy to get bogged down in the downside of having an infant in the house. Stop once in awhile to take a look at the world through your babies eyes, enjoy the little things in life like they do - seeing a familiar face, discovering something for the first time. Enjoy the new people who will come into your life as a result of being a mother. Enjoy every precious moment you and your baby have together, because your going to wake up one day, and they’ll be starting school!!

*Please don’t send me emails explaining what happens on day 96, I was simply making a point!